Ghosts of a Bloody Past
by daisuke-hieiXXX
Summary: Kenshin begins seeing things from long ago. things he'd rather not see, or really, people he'd rather not see.
1. Dreams

A/N: once again, I found myself searching through and after about two pages of fanfiction, I couldn't find a story that really caught my interest. So I sat brainstorming for a minute and decided to do a RuroKen fic. I'm really happy with this idea and ohohohoho I'm having so much fun with it. REVIEW PLEASE!

"Kenshin!" called Kaoru.

"Yes, Miss Kaoru?"

""There's a basket of laundry outside that I need you to do. Get started on that and I'll begin to cook dinner."

"Don't you mean '_Or _you'll cook dinner?' " Yahiko said poking his head into the room.

A swift stroke to the head with a bokken quickly silenced him.

"As I was saying," Kaoru continued with narrowed eyes, "get started on that or you guys aren't eating at all."

Kenshin sweatdropped and slid out of view.

The basket of laundry was just as Kaoru had said. Kenshin bent over and carried it over to the wash basin. He tied back his pink kimono and picked up a pair of Sanosuke's pants and began to scrub them. Slowly, the grass stain began to come out of the knee and it regained its white tint.

'White as her skin,' Kenshin found himself thinking.

He started, violet eyes open wide. 'Don't think about that,' he thought. 'This one doesn't want to think sad thoughts, that he doesn't.'

Kenshin finished scrubbing and pinned the clean pants on the clothesline. He knelt back down and grabbed Kaoru's pink kimono. Into the soapy water it went. Up and down the washboard Kenshin scrubbed it, still trying to shake certain thoughts from his head.

As soon as the washing was done, Kenshin unpinned his kimono and went inside, braced for whatever Kaoru may place before him.

Yahiko, Sanosuke, and Kenshin sat on their mats as Kaoru served out dinner. Kenshin picked up his bowl of rice and began to eat without (voiced) complaint.

After dinner and several trips to the bathroom, Kenshin sat down against a wall to sleep, sakabatou resting between his knees. His eyelids closed lightly and his breathing eventually became even as he fell deep into sleep.

Dreams of a white skinned, dark haired, soft spoken woman haunted his sleep she was speaking gently to him but he could not hear what she said. Tears glistened in her black eyes as she reached out a bloody hand to him. It was then that Kenshin saw that she had a great gash in her right side. Blood stood out startlingly on her white skin and kimono. She touched his scarred cheek and he awoke with a start.

Breathing quickly, Kenshin wiped his face on his sleeve. Someone tapped him gently on the shoulder.

"Kenshin," a woman said softly.

'That voice!'

Kenshin raised his eyes and saw her, the woman from his dream. Smiling, one hand outstretched, but the hand was free of blood.

"T-Tomoe", Kenshin whispered.

A/N: hmm that chapter didn't come out exactly as I'd planned, but I guess nothing can be put perfectly into words. Eh oh well. REVIEW FOR ME.


	2. Debt and illusions

A/N: heh heh as my first reviewer pointed out, I kind of made it sound like I didn't like anyone else's stories. That's not what I was trying to say, believe me! I can see where it would sound like that though. I just meant that I wasn't running into many really long stories that immediately grabbed my interest. There were a couple I really liked but I just wasn't like, on the edge of my seat really. And also keep in mind, I only read about four stories. So yeah I wasn't exactly reading a whole lot of stories so yeah. Well you're probably sick of me so on with chapter two!

"What did you say, Kenshin?" asked the woman again.

Kenshin blinked a couple of times and saw that it was not Tomoe, but Kaoru standing before him. She was dressed in her favorite kimono and had her long black hair tied up in a pink ribbon.

"Nothing, Miss Kaoru. Is something wrong?" Kenshin said shaking his head.

"I'm going down to the Akebeko (a/n: please correct me if it's spelled wrong) to talk with Tsubame and then I'm going to do some shopping. Do you want to come?"

Still a bit rattled, Kenshin took a deep breath and stretched his arms.

"I think I'll accompany you, Miss Kaoru," he smiled.

"Good. Can you be ready in ten minutes?"

"Hai."

Kaoru skipped out of the room. Kenshin could hear her waking up Yahiko and calling for Sanosuke. She was wasting her time looking for Sanosuke, Kenshin knew. He hadn't come back the night before.

Kenshin stood to his feet, slipped Sakabatou onto his waist, and went outside to wash his face. The cool water refreshed him and woke his mind up. He stood for a moment, let the water drip slowly down his face. He stared at his reflection in the water for a few minutes before grabbing a towel and scrubbing his face dry.

"Kenshin!" called Kaoru. "Let's go!"

"Coming, Miss Kaoru!"

He ran toward the dojo entrance where Kaoru and Yahiko were standing waiting for him.

"Hurry, Kenshin!" Yahiko said irritably. "It's cold."

"Hai, it is," Kaoru agreed pulling her shawl tighter around her. "I expect it will snow soon."

Kenshin stared at the steel gray sky and agreed with Kaoru.

"Let's walk quickly so we get there sooner!"

They entered the Akebeko, grateful for the warmth it provided. Tsubame led them to a seat and served them their breakfast.

"Um, also," Tsubame said staring at her feet. "I believe this belongs to you." She pointed over her shoulder at the seat two tables down. Sanosuke was fast asleep, face down on the table. (Empty) sake bottles littered the table.

"Make sure he pays his bill this time!" someone called from in back sounding more than a little annoyed.

Kenshin and Yahiko looked warily at Kaoru to see her reaction. To their surprise, she was smiling. She waved her hand at Tsubame in a casual manner and said, "Oh, don't worry. I'll make sure this _never _happens again. Ahahaha!" she laughed. It sounded fake.

Tsubame scurried away to help an irritated customer. Or to get away from Kaoru who was looking slightly deranged. One of the two.

"Miss Kaoru…?" Kenshin ventured to ask.

"Let's enjoy a nice breakfast!" she said still with the fake smile.

Sanosuke was dragged home by the ear while being loudly lectured by Kaoru.

"Sanosuke Sagara! This is the fifth time this month we've had to bring you home from some restaurant! And it's only the seventh! I wouldn't mind as much if you'd at least pay your bill! That way we wouldn't get such dirty looks when we walk around with you! Then you go and get drunk…!"

It didn't seem to sink in very well since the next day, Sano didn't come home either.

"Please go find him, Kenshin," Kaoru said while banging her head against a wall.

Not daring to argue, Kenshin tightened Sakabatou around his waist and set out in the cold night to look for him. Before he had walked even five steps, it began lightly snowing. Kenshin sighed and hurried to the Akebeko.

They hadn't seen Sano but remembered seeing him somewhere down the left side of the street. Kenshin thanked them and continued his search for his friend. Every restaurant he entered, however, reported that they had either refused him service or threatened to throw Kenshin into the street if he was with him.

"Sano seems to have been rather troublesome lately," Kenshin reflected after yet another angry store manager.

"Hey! Kenshin!"

"Oro!"

Sano was running toward Kenshin, a big grin on his face. He was running a little awkwardly with his left hand held close to his side.

He threw his right arm around Kenshin's shoulder.

"Did Kaoru send you after me?"

Kenshin told him what had been going on and Sanosuke's face took on a bit of a worried expression.

"Er, you're being serious?"

Kenshin just gave him a look.

"Guess it's time I start paying back a few debts then, huh?"

"Sano, what happened to your hand?"

He held up his left hand. The wrappings he usually wore had been removed and his fingers were all rather crooked. His hand shook slightly and the smallest move.

"I got a little carried away in a fight," he said. His face was covered in sweat as he looked at it and he bit his lip as though trying to bite back the pain.

"Miss Megumi will no doubt be able to take care of that."

"You don't think she'll be upset if I come in with another busted hand and at this hour?"

"I personally think she'll be even angrier if you wait and cause further damage to yourself," Kenshin advised.

Sano sighed. "Yeah, you're probably right."

A man bumped into Kenshin's shoulder, jarring Sano's hand. He swore loudly and turned angrily on the man. The man put his hands in the air in apology. Kenshin began to assure him that it was alright when he blanched. It was Kiyosato…. But how… how could that be possible.

"Are you all right, sir?" asked the man.

"No! Dammit! Do you see this hand?"

"No, no, sir, him. Hey there is everything all right?"

He put a hand on Kenshin's shoulder and suddenly the man looked completely different.

"Yes, I'm sorry. For a moment you looked like someone this one once knew," Kenshin smiled. "We apologize for taking up your time. Have a good evening."

"Kenshin?"

"Yes, Sano?"

"You all right?" concern was shining out from Sanosuke's eyes. He could tell when something was not right with Kenshin.

Kenshin hesitated a moment before smiling and saying, "Hai, this one was simply startled. That is all."

Sano raised an eyebrow but didn't pursue the subject.

Sano decided to go onto Megumi's alone since the dark circles under Kenshin's eyes were pleading for rest. They parted and Kenshin promised not to inform Kaoru of Sano's reputable amount of debt.

Kenshin sank against a wall. He closed his eyes and rested his head against it. Within moments, he was asleep.

A/n: a slightly boring chapter I personally thought. But I had fun with it I guess. Oh I want to do a scene with Sanosuke and Megumi oh so bad but this fic isn't about them! Me yelling at myself: no! Stay on task! Don't get distracted! Focus!

Oh and for those of you who by some strange chance don't know or remember Kiyosato, he was Tomoe's fiancé. If you don't remember Tomoe, you really shouldn't be reading this fic. leave me a review!


	3. Visions and Questions

A/N: feel free to beat me over the head for not updating in um months I think. I honestly FORGOT I had this story still! U eheheheheh I'm not stoopit! Geez! Alright alright please don't kill me for not updating. On with chapter 3!

"Sanosuke!" cried Kaoru as Sano was dragged in the next morning, Megumi pinching his ear.

"Hey, Kaoru….OUCH!" he tried to pull away from Megumi but she pinched harder. He shot a glare in her direction.

"What did you do!" asked Kaoru and Yahiko worriedly.

"Ah I got in a scuffle and well," Sano chuckled a bit.

"Not funny. You have chores to do. And if you want to be finished in time for dinner, I suggest you hurry," threatened Kaoru.

"But…I only have one hand!"

"TOUGH."

Sano slinked off looking very disgruntled. Yahiko slipped off as well to avoid getting more chores from Kaoru.

Kaoru thanked Megumi and went inside to fix herself some breakfast.

As she sat down to eat in the doorway, she looked around. Sanosuke was working, Yahiko was halfway up a tree, but Kenshin…he was nowhere insight. The laundry line was vacant and the basket sat there empty. She didn't hear the sound of footsteps as the dojo floor was cleaned. She didn't hear him humming or training or anything. It troubled her so Kaoru finished her meal quickly and shouted to Sanosuke to go find Kenshin.

Relieved to be free from his chores for awhile, Sano immediately agreed and ran off.

"Kenshin!" shouted Sano. "Kenshin!"

He didn't see him in town and decided to walk down to the riverbank for a moment and rest. He was in no hurry anyway. Kenshin would show up sooner or later. So Sanosuke strolled down the grass until he saw a red haired someone sitting by the water.

Kenshin sat on the grassy hill, Sakabatou resting against him as he stared broodingly into the water. At first, his own reflection looked back at him, red hair, violet eyes, cross shaped and all. Suddenly a breeze rippled on the water. As the water settled once more, another face stared at him. The face of the traitor, Izuka. Violent fury leapt up in Kenshin and he whirled around with his sword in hand to face Izuka.

"Kenshin? Something the matter?" asked Izuka putting his hands in the air.

"Traitor," Kenshin growled.

"What? What are you talking about? C'mon, Kenshin, you've been in the sun too long. Let's just go back to the dojo before Kaoru can kill us."

Kenshin narrowed his eyes. "How do you know Miss Kaoru?" he asked accusingly.

"Kenshin, what is it? It's me, Sanosuke."

Kenshin's eyes widened. He sheathed his sword and smiled apologetically.

"This one is most sorry, Sanosuke," he said patting the dirt from the seat of his pants. "I mistook you for someone…else."

Sanosuke didn't look entirely convinced. He raised an eyebrow at Kenshin, but decided to just let it go.

"Well alright if you say so, Kenshin. But Kaoru is worried about you so you should probably hurry back."

"Oro? What about you, Sano?"

"I think I'm gonna go to the Akebeko," Sanosuke said with a sly grin on his face. "See you later, Kenshin!"

Kenshin shook his head with a slight smile on his face until Sanosuke was out of sight. Then the grin slowly slid to a worried frown. Why had he mistaken Sano for Izuka? Why! He asked himself over and over. This was beginning to happen more and more lately. He was starting to see people from his past wandering around his present. Kenshin mulled all of this over as he walked back to the dojo where Kaoru was waiting impatiently.

Kenshin only half heard all of what she lectured to him and walked away in a bit of a daze.

He went to bed early that night and fell asleep listening to Kaoru screaming at Sanosuke.

A/N: oohoho I have plans for this. Review for me my people!


	4. Blood on the Snow

A/N: woot I'm not waiting a whole month to update! dance anyhoooow onward with chapter quatro!

It was dark still. The pinkness of dawn was creeping over the sky, tinting the clouds magenta and orange. A ray of dawn's first light shone through the crack in the sliding doors where Kenshin slept. He slept as he always did, head down, sword between his legs, and breathing softly. His eyelids twitched as he dreamed, dreamed the dreams that some would call nightmares….

_"First you kill my love, then you break my heart, then you kill me, and now you have feelings for another woman?" asked the ghostly image of Tomoe._

_"Tomoe, please, I will never love anyone as I loved you!" Kenshin protested._

_"You lie. The only thing that reminds you of me is the scar I gave you. You are forgetting me and falling for a sweaty little girl." Her voice was sharp and cold. Despite that, steely tears shone in her eyes."_

_"No, I remember you every day!" Kenshin insisted. "I swear it. You were everything to me. I will never love anyone as I loved y—'' _

_"Liar."_

_"Tomoe…!"_

_"Liar!"_

_Kenshin ran towards her and attempted to embrace her. She had her dagger hidden though and shoved it in between his ribs. A maniacal grin spread across her face as surprise and pain flooded him. Suddenly her face melted to reveal Izuka, laughing at Kenshin's hurt._

_Adrenaline shot through him and he stabbed Izuka in turn. The wound in his side streamed blood, refusing to stop. He watched the blood trickle away and saw it pooling at the side of Tomoe's still body. _

Kenshin woke with a start. He was breathing heavily and he noticed he had his sword drawn, sunlight reflecting off the blade. Kenshin frowned and sheathed the sword. He rose and slid open the doors, letting the cool morning air and sunlight flood the room. A white dust covered everything outside. It had snowed during the night and the clouds still lingered. The pleasantness of the morning did nothing to ease his tension though.

Still not quite over the shock of his dream, Kenshin meandered over to the wash basin and scrubbed his face. But he couldn't get over the feeling that he was being watched, being followed. Then there was the question of his sanity. Could he being losing his mind after all these years? Could he be hallucinating? Any solution would've at least put some of his fears to rest.

A couple hours later, Kaoru could be heard waking Yahiko and Sano (who apparently had thought better of spending another night out). She slid open the door to Kenshin's room in the middle of an "Ohayou!", but stopped. Kenshin's blankets were folded and he was no where to be seen. She sighed. Couldn't the men at this dojo just stay put!

Kenshin had once again taken to the lakeside. He stared at his reflection in the water, his scar livid on his pale face. he brought a hand to his scar and traced it as he often did. As he continued to stare at the water, another face joined his. It was a woman. It was Tomoe. He wheeled around but saw nothing. Perplexed, Kenshin slowly turned back around and continued to stare at the water. A cool winter breeze sent his flaming hair whipping around his face. The bare twigs and branches of the trees whistled and whispered as snow was dusted off them.

_"Kenshin…,"_ the breeze seemed to whisper.

This time, Kenshin did not look around.

"This one will not be troubled by the ghosts of his bloody past, that he will not," he said firmly. He folded his arms and rested them on his knees, still staring intently at the water. Kenshin's eyelids began to flutter after awhile. His sleepless nights were starting to catch up to him. The air was getting colder and Kenshin decided to head back before it began to snow as the steely sky suggested it might.

Kenshin stood to his feet and turned to walk back. Someone was standing in his way, however. Someone being Tomoe.

"Why do you trouble this one so?" he whispered.

She did not say anything. Kenshin scarcely believed she was really there. But, just to be sure, just to see, he reached out, and grabbed her snow white hands. They were cold as ice, and not just from the weather. A faint glow seemed to surround them, as though they didn't even belong in this world.

"Kenshin…," whispered Tomoe.

Kenshin lifted her ghostly hand to his lips and kissed it. He moved close to her cool form and embraced her.

"Even if this is not real, this one is very happy to see you, Tomoe-san."

"Kenshin…"

Kenshin laid his head on hers and breathed in. The smell of white plum filled his mind.

"You are forgetting me," whispered Tomoe.

Kenshin stared her hard in the eyes.

"This one," he began softly. "shall never, ever forget you, Tomoe-san."

Shadowy tears filled her eyes and flowed down her face, disappearing before they hit the ground.

"I wish I could believe that, Aranta." (A/N: Japanese for "my love" the spelling might be wrong but hey I'm not Japanese.) She spoke in the smallest whisper that Kenshin could barely hear.

"Tomoe-san, wha—."

Kenshin never finished his sentence. His eyes opened wide with shock as he felt the cold steel of a blade plunge into his side. Warm blood flowed down his side, pooling in the grass and melted the frost on the delicate green blades.

As his knees buckled and hit the ground, he saw Tomoe vanish with the breeze, a smile playing maliciously on her lips.

The pain overwhelmed him and though he fought for consciousness, Kenshin slipped into darkness….

(A/N): oh I kind of liked this chapter. not that I like seeing Kenshin get hurt but because Tomoe was sooo OoC. But yes. That's ok. It all works out. You'll see. REVIEW!


	5. Wounds of the Heart

A/N: So yes. Kenshin is losing it. He's schizophrenic. Or maybe delusional. Or perhaps he's hallucinating. Who knows? I DO! Mwahhaa anyhooo read on my beloved reader.

"What happened?" exclaimed Megumi when Sano brought a limp, bleeding Kenshin to her later that day.

"I don't know," Sanosuke panted. "I found him lying by the river."

"Something had to have happened, Sano! Men like Ken-san do not let themselves be hurt this badly!"

She led Sanosuke, who was still holding Kenshin, to a spot on the floor. Kenshin was laid out, his shirt removed, and his wound was accordingly treated. A sweat broke out on Megumi's forehead as she feverishly worked to clean and wrap the ugly wound in Kenshin's side. Sano looked on helplessly.

"He's—he's gonna be alright? Isn't he, Megumi?"

"The knife didn't cut through any vital organs or arteries. He was lucky there. And even though he's lost more blood than I would like, Ken-san is a very strong man. I think he'll pull through alright with no lasting injuries."

"Well that's—that's good," said Sanosuke. He had nothing else to say so he sank to the floor and eventually fell asleep.

Megumi sat troubled after she had finished with Kenshin. _Who? Who could have done this to Ken-san? _She asked herself over and over again.

"Megumi! Megumi!" came Kaoru's frantic voice early the next morning. She was pounding loudly on the doors and getting very frantic. "Open up! Please, Megumi!"

A very groggy Megumi slid the door open a crack and asked, "What do you want at this hour, you sweaty little girl?"

"Both Kenshin and Sano are missing! I've looked everywhere else and I need you to—SANO!" The little color in Kaoru's face drained as Sanosuke's face appeared over Megumi's shoulder. "You were here…overnight!"

Both Megumi and Sano leaped about ten feet from each other hastily, frantically waving their hands and shouting insults at each other. This banished any ideas Kaoru may have had about the two of them. But that left Kenshin.

"Where's Kenshin then, Sano? Do you know?"

"Ah yeah. About Kenshin…" began Sano. But Megumi cut him off.

"Sano brought Kenshin to me yesterday afternoon."

"Brought him to—?"

"Yes. Kenshin was hurt quite badly." Kaoru took her breath in sharply. "He'll live, and without lasting hurt I'll add."

"But, how!" Kaoru sputtered.

Megumi and Sano both shook their heads.

"Let me see him," Kaoru said sternly. Megumi gestured for her to follow and lead Kaoru to where Kenshin was resting.

An angry red splotch had seeped through the bandages on Kenshin's side. Kaoru felt a hard knot choke her throat. Her vision blurred but she did not let the tears fall. She took a few steps towards Kenshin, but found she didn't want to be there. She didn't want to see the man who had been her pillar of strength for so long, lying there defenseless and wounded. She couldn't bear it.

Kaoru turned on her heel and walked calmly towards the door. She slipped on her shoes and walked down the road a while. As soon as she was out of sight, she broke into a run, tears spilling over her eyes.

_I see her, the woman Kenshin now loves…running like a fool…crying for a cold hearted murderer. A mere girl, and not nearly as attractive as Tomoe was. Not as strong in her spirit. Not as elegant. Not as intelligent. She does not serve a purpose in this life. She should die…yes…that would sting Kenshin's heart more than the cold bite of a blade through his chest. Yes…she will die…like Kenshin's wife before her. _

Kenshin slept restlessly. Visions of an angry and lonely Tomoe floated around in his mind. She was a rotting corpse, the long, ugly gash on her right side flowing crimson. Her once beautiful, snowy, flawless skin was now a sickly green. Her eyes were dull and full of hatred and emptiness compared to the light and longing that had once filled them.

He tried to reach for her, but whenever he did, pain seared through him like fire. So he watched helplessly as Tomoe's ghostly form screamed her regrets at him.

Megumi sat by Kenshin's side ready to tend to him should his fever worsen or his wounds reopen again. Her head lolled from side to side as she fought to stay awake. Her head jerked up and her eyes snapped open when she realized she had drifted off. She looked to Kenshin and saw he was still completely motionless. A sliver of moonlight illuminated his pale face as a tear rolled down his cheek.

A/N: omg it's only been like, forever since I've written anything and that's bad and someone needs to hit me. Oh dear. Oh well. I really hope I finish this up quick so I don't forget about it again. Send me angry emails so I don't forget. Kk. REVIEW


	6. The Silent Goodbye

A/N: eh heh heh…I do deserve a slap don't i? I feel very very bad for not updating the last chapter for the longest time so that's not gonna happen now! Heh heh….dont kill me…. ;;;;

Kenshin let his eyes open a bit to take in his surroundings. It was sunny outside and the light shone through a crack in the sliding door. Megumi sat sleeping against the wall. Next to her were a pile of clean cloths and a bowl of water. He attempted to sit up but found that his head swam when he tried. He was sore all over and a dull ache came from his side. Kenshin lifted a hand towards his aching side and felt the slightest touch caused him pain. What had happened? His mind was floating around, uncollected. He gathered his thoughts trying to remember.

_Tomoe…_

_Tomoe…_

_Tomoe…_

That's right. It was Tomoe. His memory flooded back to him in waves. Depression settled in and Kenshin allowed himself to close his eyes once more.

Megumi jerked awake and saw Kenshin.

"Ken-san!" she cried happily. "You're awake! Thank goodness."

Kenshin tried to thank her, for he was sure he wouldn't be awake if it was not for Megumi, but he found there was a lump in his throat and his mouth was dry. He settled for a nod which Megumi understood.

She left to tell Sanosuke Kenshin had awakened, leaving Kenshin alone with his thoughts again.

Doubt, guilt, sorrow, and depression stabbed at Kenshin worse than the pain in his side. All these years he had been trying to atone for his sins. The sins which Tomoe had helped him realize. He had been living because of her. Every day he drew breath because Tomoe had saved him from himself. But then he had met Kaoru. His thoughts of Tomoe, while they weren't altogether nonexistent, grew less frequent. He found himself living to protect every at the Kamiya Dojo, particularly Miss Kaoru. Was this wrong? Was his new found happiness an insult to Tomoe's memory? Perhaps so.

All the same, Kenshin couldn't shake the feeling that Tomoe was far angrier at him than he thought was in her nature. She acted like some of the assassins he had encountered in the Revolution: heartless, blood thirsty, and mad. Is this what ten years in the grave could do to somebody? Even someone as gentle and forgiving as Tomoe?

Kenshin sighed in exasperation. No one could help him come to a conclusion and he was tired of trying to come to one on his one. He was alone.

Megumi returned with a cup of water which she offered to Kenshin. She helped him sit up to take a long drink.

"Arigatou, Megumi-san," Kenshin said with a sad smile.

Megumi returned the smile.

"Now let's take a look at that wound, Ken-san. It should be closed up by now."

"Kaoru!" shouted Sanosuke as he barged into her room.

Kaoru shrieked and threw her hairbrush at Sanosuke.

"Knock first, Sano! I'm not dressed yet!" she raged.

"Ow. Gah…Kaoru!" Sano rubbed his forehead gingerly. "I just came to tell you Kenshin's awake! Dammit, Kaoru that—AHH!"

Kaoru had flung the door open, shoving Sano over in the process, banging his broken hand. Tears of pain sprang up in his eyes but Kaoru paid him no heed.

"Why didn't you come get me sooner?" she shouted.

"What's going on?" asked Yahiko poking around the corner.

Kaoru grabbed his hand and dragged him along.

"Hurry! Kenshin's awake!"

"It's not like he's _going _anywhere anytime soon, ya know," Yahiko pointed out. Kaoru punched him in response.

"Shut up! And I want the both of you to behave, understand!"

"Yes, Ma'am," Sano and Yahiko replied obediently.

Kenshin was slipping his pink kimono on when Kaoru, Yahiko, and Sano appeared in the doorway looking a bit winded.

"Kenshin!" Kaoru cried. "You're already up and moving around?"

"Thanks to Miss Megumi's excellent care this one feels better already, that he does," Kenshin replied brightly with a smile.

"Glad to see ya up and movin', Kenshin," Sano remarked.

Kenshin nodded in agreement.

"Would you all care for some tea?" Megumi asked.

Half an hour later, they were waving good-bye to Megumi and walking back towards the Dojo. They walked slowly, even though there were a few inches of white snow on the ground.

Kenshin was silent save a word here and there. Kaoru babbled on and on about taking them all out to dinner (Sano whooped at this) and celebrating Kenshin's well being. She was worried (and a bit annoyed) that Kenshin's only response was, "That sounds wonderful, Miss Kaoru," but she allowed it to pass, thinking he must be tired.

Halfway there, Kenshin announced that he'd like to walk alone for awhile.

"This one will meet up with you at the Dojo, that he will," Kenshin assured them.

Kaoru felt uneasy about leaving him. After all, the last time Kenshin had been alone, he ended up seriously wounded. But Kenshin assured her he would be all right.

Kenshin waited for them to be out of sight until he turned from the road into the woods.

He had to leave. He couldn't stay near them…near Kaoru…with this guilt. He didn't even know how to tell them good-bye. Until he had found the answers, he couldn't stay. He had drawn his sword on them. Although he hadn't physically harmed them, there was no guarantee he wouldn't. This is for the best, Kenshin decided as he continued to wander through the trees.

A/N: this chapter was more of a look into kenshin's feelings so not very much happened except Kenshin leaving of course. tear it's so sad. BUT BE PROUD OF ME BC I DIDN'T TAKE FOREVER TO UPDATE! I DIDN'T EVEN TAKE A WHOLE DAY!

Mwahhahaha I'm the greatest.

REVIEW


	7. Just Desserts

A/N: I'm updating during exams! This is quite unexpected. Thanks for all the reviews! They're very much appreciated! I love you all!

"Kaoru, you coming in?" Sano called to Kaoru as she stood in the chilly air by the front gates.

"I'll be in a minute. I'm just waiting for Kenshin," she replied with a smile.

Sano shrugged and retreated to the warmth of the indoors.

Kaoru breathed on her cold hands, rubbing them together as she tried to stay warm. Even though the sun had not even begun to set, it was bitterly cold. The sky was overcast. There was no doubt in Kaoru's mind that they would be getting a hard snow storm anytime now. She wished desperately that Kenshin would hurry. He was recovering from a serious injury and had no business being out in the cold in his condition. Megumi would eat Kaoru alive for letting him out alone.

'It's alright I suppose,' thought Kaoru. 'He'll be home any minute now and then he can get a good rest.'

But Kenshin hadn't returned by dinner. It was nightfall. He still hadn't returned. The snow was beginning to come down and it was getting colder and colder by the minute. Kaoru left her post at the front gate finally, tears brimming over in her eyes and a cough racking her chest from being in the severe weather so long. Kenshin was missing again.

Kenshin trudged through the snow. His eyes were barely open as he tried to keep the snowflakes out of them. His side felt as though every step he took reopened the wound and doubled the pain. Every breath was a struggle. And there was no shelter anywhere Kenshin could see. Everything was white. He couldn't see five inches in any direction. The snow and the darkness made it impossible.

Sleep was beckoning to Kenshin. It was taunting him. Kenshin knew, however, that if he fell asleep, he would certainly freeze to death. His eyes began to droop. He dragged his feet. Sakabatou felt like a dead weight hanging from his side.

Suddenly, he heard something. Something startling. It was the last thing he would have expected to hear. It was alarming and shook Kenshin from his stupor. _Laughter._

"Who's there?" Kenshin called to the storm, one hand on Sakabatou's hilt. "Is anyone there?"

The laughter flitted around the trees in every direction. It seemed to come from everywhere. Kenshin felt a sick dread in his stomach.

"_Battousai…." _Hissed a voice.

Sakabatou flew from its sheath.

"Who are you?" demanded Kenshin.

_"Don't remember? Ah, What a shame. After all I did for you all those years ago."_

It was a familiar woman's voice. It was Tomoe's voice.

"Tomoe?" Kenshin ventured. "Is it you?"

The voice only laughed.

"What do you want? Is something wrong?"

Laughter again. Then she spoke.

_"What do I want? How I wished you would ask that. You were always selfish. I didn't think you would care about what I wanted." _

Kenshin said nothing. His eyes flitted in every direction trying to locate the voice.

_"Have you had fun without me?"_

Again, Kenshin remained silent.

_"Are you enjoying your new friends? Your new life? Your new identity? It's nice to be not be known as a murderer isn't it?" _

Kenshin felt something boiling inside of him. Whether his fever was rising or his temper, he couldn't tell. Suddenly, he saw someone. It was unmistakably a woman. It was unmistakably Tomoe. He stood his ground, but lowered Sakabatou.

"Tomoe," he whispered.

More laughter.

_"How easily the human mind can be fooled. Especially yours, Battousai. You dream of something so much you can make it a reality for yourself. You fool." _

Tomoe morphed, her features changing drastically, stretching and pulling every which way. When it had stopped, Kenshin felt his anger surface. He knew that man. He knew that face. It was the only face that could possibly bring him to kill.

"Izuka," Kenshin growled.

Izuka laughed.

Kaoru lay on her mat. She had pulled the covers tightly around her slim frame, trying to keep the cold out. The wind and snow lashed against the dojo. The doors shook and shuddered in the wind. Suddenly, a door slammed open, cold air and snow flooding the room. Kaoru leapt up and struggled to close it. Once it was shut tightly, she crawled back onto her mat.

Worry plagued her like awful disease. Kenshin was out in the storm. He was healing from a serious injury which no one knew how he got in the first place. He could die.

But that wasn't what really worried her. No, Kaoru knew Kenshin could take care of himself. What truly worried her was that he had left her. Left her and Sanosuke and Yahiko and the dojo and gone off wandering again. He hadn't even said good-bye.

Pulling her legs up to her chest, Kaoru began to sob gently.

White hot anger flowed through Kenshin like a green poison. He felt himself slip back to Battousai. He was a bit surprised at how easy it was. His amber eyes searched every bit of the terrain expertly. He felt his senses heighten. He heard twigs snapping in the wind. He smelled rabbits cowering in their holes. He could feel every which way the wind tugged at his kimono.

The wind snapped Kenshin's hair and clothes against his rigid body. He was tense. He was excited. He hadn't been able to seriously fight in years. For how can you seriously fight when you have a vow not to kill? His tongue flicked over his lips.

"Come, Izuka," he demanded. "You know I have no fear of dying."

"I know you don't," laughed Izuka. "You really are a fool. Think, Battousai. What has caused you the most pain in your insignificant life?"

Both Kenshin and Izuka knew he spoke of Tomoe's death.

"I won't let you hold that over me, you bastard."

"Hold it over you?" Izuka laughed. Then he grinned. "I'm going to destroy everything that brings you happiness. I'm going to destroy your life. I'm going to ruin it. But I'm not going to kill you. You're going to live through it all. You're going to watch me slit the smooth skin of that girl's lovely throat open. You're going to watch as her blood flows onto the white snow. And you're going to be helpless so stop me."

All while he had been speaking, anger flared up in Kenshin. The desire to kill was stronger in him than it had ever been. He wanted to kill Izuka. He felt his heart might burst from wanting it so badly.

"Watch her die," spat Izuka.

Suddenly, the roaring of the wind stopped and Kenshin felt warm. He felt as though he was falling. It was a pleasant feeling. He could stay like this forever. It was so warm….

But then he felt himself hit the floor. The cold was back. He opened his eyes and heard Izuka's voice in his ear.

He only laughed.

Kenshin looked around him. Kaoru's sleeping form was clearly visible. He was in her room. He was at the Kamiya Dojo.

"Ready…set…go…" Chanted Izuka.

Kenshin felt himself rise to his feet. He felt his hand grip Sakabatou's hilt. He felt his legs carrying him towards Kaoru. But he wasn't trying to. He screamed to his brain to stop. But Izuka's laughter filled his head. It was almost deafening.

His hand settled on Kaoru's soft neck. He felt her smooth skin beneath his fingertips, skin he himself had been afraid to touch.

Kaoru moaned and rolled over. It was clear she had been crying. Tears streaked her face and her eyes appeared swollen. Kenshin's hand shook her shoulders and she blinked one eye open. When she realized it was Kenshin, she leapt up and began speaking quickly. But Kenshin couldn't hear her. All he could hear was Izuka.

"Poor thing thinks you probably came to say good-bye before you went wandering again. Foolish woman."

"Why are you doing this!" shouted Kenshin. "I don't recall having done any harm to you at all!"

"You were supposed to die," said Izuka. And for once, he wasn't laughing. "You were supposed to die. Tomoe was supposed to commit suicide. And Hitokiri Battousai would become a memory the Revolutionists would only remember in their dreams. But you decided to live. You bastard. You lived and Katsura discovered what my companion's and I had planned. I had money. I had a ticket out of Japan. Away from the Revolution. Away from the people I had betrayed. But because you lived, Katsura tracked me down and killed me. I was so close to freedom I could see the sails of the ship. You bastard. I spent my spare time following you around and cleaning up after your messes. You couldn't have just died? You bastard. You bastard!"

Kenshin only half listened. He was straining to hear Kaoru's words.

Izuka sensed Kenshin wasn't listening. Once more, Kenshin felt his hands move against his will. His arms closed around Kaoru in a strong embrace. He breathed in her hair. It smelled of sunlight and the chilled winter air. It wasn't white plums, but it was a pleasant scent.

"Kenshin?" he heard her ask. "Are you alright?"

Izuka began laughing once again.

Kenshin felt as though he was going to be sick. His hands were moving again. And they had gripped the hilt of Sakabatou, drawing it from its sheath.

A/N: oo this was a long one. Hehe go me. Very cliffy ending I thinks. I like it though. I had a lot of fun with this. Ohhhohohoho it's so HARD to keep Kenshin in character. stabs eyeballs ah. Oh well. Leave me a review if you please.


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